The World According to Renshi

When people think of loss and grief, they usually think of grieving the death of a loved one.  Grief is defined as the normal and natural reaction to change or loss of any kind.  Additionally, grief is defined as the conflicting feelings caused by the end of or change in a familiar pattern of behavior.  Feelings of grief can be associated with many losses including, but not limited to moving, divorce, a broken friendship, and job loss.¹    

According to Intellizence.com, since January 1st, 2026, 1,621+ companies have announced mass layoffs including Meta Platforms, IKEA, Heineken, Oracle, UPS, Amazon, Dell Technologies and more.²  These are a small group of companies with name recognition, and they are only the tip of the iceberg of companies large and small that are restructuring, laying off, downsizing, right-sizing or offering early retirement.   

Job loss evokes a wide range of emotions and reactions that should be recognized as grief.  The obvious losses are financial, but there are many underlying losses associated with job loss that can have a tremendous impact on the individual, his/her family, and friends.  The goal of this article is to help people understand and recognize the losses and reactions associated with losing one’s job or career.  While much of this content is geared toward the person who lost their job, it is also provides valuable insights for family members and friends.   

Job loss, in many cases, can be considered an “off-time” but also creates secondary losses, cumulative loss and disenfranchised loss, and contains all the associated challenges such as peers distancing themselves, and formal support resources that don’t provide appropriate responses.  Many of these resources are geared to help with determining transferable skills and resume writing, but they neglect to support the emotional issues of losing a job. 

In an article published in ANXIETY, STRESS, & COPING 2019, VOL. 32, NO. 4, 428–442 https://doi.org/10.1080/10615806.2019.1619703 by: Janske H. W. van Eersel, Toon W. Taris, and Paul A. Boelen, entitled Development and initial validation of the job loss grief scale; employment is a key element in life that goes beyond basic psychological, social, and economic needs (Martela & Pessi, 2018).  According to Jahoda (1981), employment not only results in earning an income; it also imposes time structure during the day, implies regularly shared experiences and contacts with people outside the family, links individuals to goals and purposes that transcend their own, defines aspects of personal status and identity, and enforces activity. Pratt and Ashforth (2003) stated that the meaning of work is overall a process of finding purpose in one’s existence by trying to answer four questions: from a role perspective, “What am I doing?”; from a membership perspective, “Where do I belong?”; from an identity perspective, “Who am I?”; and from the perspective of meaning, “Why am I here?”³ In the absence of employment, answering these questions may sometimes be difficult, which may explain the disruptive impact of unemployment and why having a bad job is still often preferred over being unemployed (Jahoda, 1981).   

Further in the article they state: Like other major life events involving loss such as bereavement, involuntary job loss can turn someone’s world upside down and can result in loss of identity, social contacts and self-worth (Antczak, 1999). Fundamental assumptions about life and the world must be re-evaluated and life stories reviewed (Brewington et al., 2004).⁴ These consequences of job loss can fuel symptoms of grief and Complicated Grief. 

Losses (Direct. Secondary and Cumulative) include, but are not limited to: 

• Loss of income 

• Loss of health insurance 

• Inability to provide food and clothing and shelter for the family 

• Loss of status in the community 

• Loss of self-respect 

• Loss of respect from family members 

• Inability to maintain family lifestyle 

• Family vacations 

• Club and extracurricular activities 

• Dining out and more… 

• Loss of work-related friends 

• Loss of identity 

Most of these could be considered secondary losses to the primary loss of a job; but the cumulative effect of these losses can result in all the biopsychosocial aspects of grief. 

A research study published in the International Journal of Cognitive Therapy (2022) 15:191–208 https://doi.org/10.1007/s41811-021-00126-6 entitled “Negative Cognitions and Emotional Distress Following Job Loss” states that, “Negative cognitions following job loss can contribute to emotional distress by motivating individuals to adopt coping styles that reduce stress in the short run while obstructing adjustment in the long run. It is unclear which specific cognitions are related to symptoms of complicated grief, depression, and anxiety following job loss.”⁵  To fill this gap, this study introduces the Beliefs about Loss of Work (BLOW) scale and examines its psychometric properties. 

High scores on the subscales “Self, Life, and Future” seem related to a diminished sense of self and confusion about one’s role in life (Papa & Lancaster, 2016), which could lead to apathy and withdrawal, making it more difficult to move on and set new goals⁶. 

High scores on the “World and Self-Blame” subscales seem to be related to a low sense of control (Janoff-Bulman, 1999), feelings of bitterness, and cynicism about the world (Dalbert, 2011),⁷ 

High scores on the subscale “Others” could indicate a feeling of emotional detachment from others, social isolation, and stigmatizing from losing one’s job loss (Blau et al., 2013; Peterie et al., 2019).⁸ 

As the research indicates, there is quantifiable analysis that verifies the grief associated with job loss.  The question becomes, what are the professional interventions available to assist the person and family cope with the cumulative losses?  Realistically, family members are equally affected by the loss.  Children who are involved in club sports or spend time with friends at a private club are suddenly shunned.  The spouse may have to find either part-time or full-time employment, which changes the family dynamic even more.   

In the article, Negative Cognitions and Emotional Distress Following Job Loss, the authors provide ideas regarding clinical interventions.  For high scores on the subscales “Self, Life, and Future” Interventions could be targeting restoration of one’s self-confidence, exploring social roles besides being an employee, rebuilding one’s identity, re-engagement in meaningful activities, and setting concrete goals to reshape the future perspective.  For high scores on the “world and self-blame subscales” interventions could be aimed at regaining one’s trust in the world, increasing one’s sense of control, and challenging irrational assumptions about one’s own role in the job loss event.  For high scores on the “Other” subscale, interventions could be aimed at reconnecting with others, setting realistic expectations of others, and exploring one’s personal need in terms of social support. Finally, high scores on the subscales threatening or inappropriate grief reactions seem to be associated with avoidance of own thoughts and feelings (Archer & Rhodes, 1995). Therefore, the basic psychological education on the function of emotions and thoughts combined, for instance, with diffusion techniques from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, could be a useful intervention. Overall, these negative cognitions might hinder someone from adapting to one’s new life, setting goals to build a future, and engaging in meaningful activities; therefore, it is necessary to be able to refine and develop specific interventions. 

While all this is incredibly valuable in addition to standard job seeking skills, none of the interventions deal with the family – or how the person who lost his/her job can help the family through the ordeal. 

Job Loss Grief… A personal reflection on what not to do. 

“Older workers present a series of features that determine that their job loss grieving process is more intense and lasts longer than that of other younger workers, regardless of whether the job loss was recent or not.”⁹   

I have worked in sales and marketing for my entire career.  First in advertising and printing sales and then as National Sales Manager for a division of Fostoria Industries.  In 1996, I was recruited to be Corporate Marketing Manager for Findlay Publishing Company, a family-owned media group consisting of a newspaper, a printing company, and seven radio stations in Ohio and Indiana.  In that position, I was responsible for revenue and had the opportunity to be on the acquisition team when we purchased more companies.  I was very involved in the community, serving on boards and assisting in political campaigns.  We belonged to the country club and lived a great life.  

As the local media world became besieged with competition from social media and Google, we started to suffer.  I had made several recommendations regarding down-sizing, but ultimately the owner decided that letting the two highest paid non-family members go would send a message to the entire company.  I was one of those people. 

I was given the opportunity to seek employment elsewhere around 10:30 in the morning.  By noon I was sitting at Fricker’s with a pitcher of beer, a notepad and my laptop putting together a business plan for a marketing consulting firm.  By 10:00 the next morning, I had my first client.  From there, I expanded my efforts into being a manufacturer’s representative for a California-based LED industrial lighting company.  We were forced to reduce expenses like the country club and we downsized our home, but my wife had a very good job so between my efforts and her salary and insurance, we really didn’t struggle that much. 

But – I never realized how much of my identity was tied to my career.  And, in my normal way of handling things, I bulldozed right past taking a pause and reflecting.  I never really correlated grief with anything other than death.  And even in those cases, my mantra has always been “suck it up and move on”.  I continued my consulting and supplemented it with some part-time retail jobs and life kept moving forward, but things were different.  Thank God, I have the most supportive and understanding wife on the planet.   

I had lost my passion.  My career was such a huge part of my life… my being and nothing I did reignited the flame that I had in that position.  And then God hit me over the head.  I am proof that God is incredibly patient.  One day it came to me that God wanted me to pursue Him through continuing my education at Winebrenner.  I completed all the necessary paperwork, found ancient transcripts, was accepted into the MAPT program, signed up for classes and then called my wife and said, “Guess what I’m doing?”  Keep in mind that I have lived about as secular a life as possible.  No church experience until my late 20’s and only then because we had kids.  And here I was moving past the deep end of the pool and straight into the ocean.  My wife was somewhat surprised, but fully supportive.  And just recently she told me that she finally sees me with a passion she didn’t think she would see again. 

Job loss is hard.  It’s the hardest thing I’ve dealt with considering all the ramifications associated with it.  But there is hope.  It may not come from another company offering you a job.  It may not come from employment at all.  Keep an open mind and pray; and then keep your eyes and ears open for God’s response.